the Professional Mommy

What's that?

You noticed the changes to my blog after coming back to read my latest post after a few months??

Well friends, with the changes I have made recently and the new direction my life has taken, (read my last post here if you haven't yet) I decided that this blog needed to reflect  those changes.

Welcome to my new and improved blog!

Doesn't it look good?

I'm a fan of the chevron background.

Love chevron.

Anyway!

I have taken my knowledge of child development,
     my 15 years of experience working with children,
          my 10 years of direct early childhood teaching experience,
               my degree in early childhood education,
                    my degree in child development,
                         my status as a child development professional and parent-infant specialist,
                              most of all, my love and passion for children,

and I am giving ALL of that to my OWN children.

I am a mommy first.

A professional mommy.

Seven Weeks

Well here I am! 7 weeks into being a full time work-at-home Mommy.

SEVEN WEEKS. 

7 weeks of enjoying my family and watching my children grow.

7 weeks of trusting in God and following His guidance.

7 weeks of being blessed beyond belief! 

Seven weeks is not really a LOT of time. It's less than two months. It's amazing how much has happened in seven weeks. Allow me to share just a few of the things we have been up to....

Left "day job" and started new family-friendly business 

          (shameless plug www.happybabiesonline.com, more on that later!)

Started homeschooling, learned about bugs/apples/health & hygiene, went on family field trips, joined a new local homeschool co-op, volunteered to teach the preschoolers every other Wednesday.

Planned a 1st birthday party for our baby girl. Had a blast celebrating her first year with friends and family, and pink dinosaurs. 

Spent some time creating for Pink Tree (another shameless plug, I know), participated in two outdoor craft shows, fulfilled custom orders through etsy after business picked up, decided to host a local handmade market, planned and currently recruiting vendors- HomeTown Handmade Market coming in December!

Decided to start "selling" Usborne Books again as I want way too many of them for our homeschool so I definitely need to get them at a discount, and share with everyone else how much we love them! (warning: more shameless plugs ahead- seriously check these books out) Currently hosting a book-raiser for children in domestic violence situations staying in emergency shelter, more info here.

I've watched my 4.5 year old daughter learn, and blow my mind with how bright she is (side note: I totally need to step up my game in homeschooling, she is WAY ahead of where I started with her).

I've hung out with my baby and watched her dance, fall in love with Elmo, listened to her very first "words", snuggled with her while she was cutting teeth, rocked her to sleep, and listened to her laugh- she has the best baby laugh I have EVER heard. Love it. 

I've greeted my husband when he gets home from work. Thanks to our wonderful family, we have had a few nights out just the two of us. We've even had a few days together without the girls. 

We've been busy. (Husband says I am busier now than when I had a "day job") 

We've been together.

We've been so very blessed! 

This is just the beginning. God has plans. BIG plans. For our family. For ME.

And you know what? I'm finally listening. 

And it has been amazing. 

Stay Tuned...

Remember that time I started a blog and then abandoned it as soon as life got in the way? Yeah, me either...

I really don't know where the time has gone. The last six months have just been crazy! Constantly moving, not enough hours in the day, too many people needing me... I haven't had the time or energy for the ones who need me and my time the most.

I am making changes. 

Changes to my priorities. Changes to how I spend my time. Changes to how I contribute to my family.

In about four weeks I get to be a full-time mom. I have resigned from my "day job" to put in the time and energy to the MOST important job I will ever have. The job that I was called by God to do. Raise children up in His name. 

I'm going to hang out on the floor with my crawling baby and not worry about what I "should" be doing. Being with my kid is exactly what I should be doing.

I am going to listen to my preschooler's crazy stories and watch her living room performances and not once let my eyes go to my phone to text someone else who needs something from me.

I'm going to ask my husband about HIS day, instead of unloading all of my stress onto him. 

I'm going to keep up with the laundry and not let the dishes pile in the sink.

Maybe.

That all being said anyone who knows me knows I am a dreamer. I have big plans. I am very passionate about these plans. Plans and passions that I am brainstorming into one adventure. 

But for right now I am going to sit still and listen. 

I'm going to enjoy what God has blessed me with.

I'm going to give God control over these passions and "plans" of mine.

I'm going to allow Him to lead me down whatever road I need to travel.

Stay tuned....

52 Week Savings Plan

Have you seen this floating around social media? It was a big "pin" all over pinterest around the new year. It is a week by week savings plan for one year. By putting money in a jar (or savings account) every week and gradually increasing the amounts you can save $1,378 in a year! Sounds good to me!

I don't know about you, but we have the most awful time saving money around here. You know how most couples have a "saver" and a "spender"? Yeah well, we are BOTH spenders. 

and that is NOT good. 

I am getting better. I have hope for us. 

....I also don't want to let Dave Ramsey down!

This week by week savings plan seems simple and feasible for us. I like having the actual jar with the chart on the counter. It serves as a reminder to set money aside for saving and we like the physical evidence of our progress. 

Whether you need to build your emergency fund, pay down debt, OR save for something fun like a family vacation; I think this is a wonderfully easy way to do it! 

Variation: I've seen several people mention doing this backwards. You start with the highest amounts first, that way as you get closer to the holiday season you are putting LESS money into the jar and your budget won't be so tight around Christmas- when budgets are already tight! Doing it this way also increases your motivation as you save more right away and see more immediate results. 

Save more! If you are doing this with a jar on the counter, also toss your spare change in there! Along with any random $1 bills you may have in your wallet at the end of the day. You'll be surprised how just that little bit more will add up in the end!

Print out your own savings chart and start saving NOW!

What are YOU saving for??

Mommy Brain is REAL people!

Our newest little girl was born September 30th. 8 pounds, 12 ounces, 20 1/4 inches long.

She is pretty perfect.

Despite the fact that she is a wonderful baby who is generous enough to let us get sufficient sleep, my brain is mush. Just like "pregnancy brain"... "mommy brain" is a very REAL thing! 

Several times over the last 5 weeks I have opened my laptop with a wonderful topic to write about, ready to be alone with my own thoughts and....... then I have nothing. 

No, wait that's not true. 

I have pinterest...and facebook...and amazon...

Things that I can mindlessly scroll through for hours before realizing that I never 

finished (or even started, oops) that blog post! And now baby is awake and ready to eat again. Maybe I will get to that post later...

....or maybe I will actually do one of the things I have pinned on pinterest.

As I am recovering from a cesarean  I'm a little bit slow to get back to "normal" (whatever that is). Though the times I feel some energy, I get all excited and motivated to do things! 

Like, 5 things. 

At the same time.

Last night I started to organize my closet, then I remembered that I wanted to take out the baby's newborn stuff that she has already grown out of. I went to her room, folded three footie sleepers and started to pile them on the floor when I remember that we don't have any burp cloths clean. I gathered up all the girls' blankets and towels and started them in the washer. While I was in the basement I remembered that I needed to do a couple things for my Etsy shop. I went upstairs and printed out some order invoices for custom orders I need to make. I took the invoices out to the kitchen table and realized I needed to make dinner. Got dinner ready for the three-year-old, nursed the baby, and started to clean up the kitchen. Husband comes home and asks why there is a small pile of footie sleepers on the floor of the baby's room. 

Oh yeah, I forgot I was doing that. Oops.

Is postpartum ADD a real thing? 

What kind of parent are you?

This is a topic we have addressed in our home today, so I thought I would share it with you. 

Do you realize how powerful you are? YOU have the power to change your child. Or at the very least, change how your child responds to you. Many parents stress about the way their child acts and wonder why, failing to realize that they hold the key! You can change your child's attitude or responses by first changing YOURS. 

Did you know that there are FOUR different styles of parenting? Each is defined enough that we have names for them and can be identified easily by certain characteristics. There are two that are more common, and most parents identify with one of the other. One is authoritarian and the other is authoritative. They sound pretty similar don't they? Let's see which one you are.

Authoritarian parents have high expectations of their children (i.e. expecting a two year old to sit quietly for a long period of time), demand automatic respect (i.e. "because I said so" or "because I'm mom/dad"), expect automatic obedience (i.e."it's my way or the highway"), and feel the need to be in control of every aspect of their child's life. It sounds intense, and you might say right away that this is NOT you at all! But think about your interactions with your child...you might find that this is all too familiar. 

Authoritative parents are not passive by any means. Just because they don't quite "lay down the law" like authoritarian parents, doesn't mean that they don't desire the same outcomes. We all want our children to respect us, to listen to us, and to behave appropriately. What is different with authoritative parents is the way they go about getting those results. Authoritative parents also have limits and rules, the difference is that they take the time to explain the REASONS for those rules. The rules/limits are CLEAR and appropriate for the age of the child. They give their children choices and allow them some control. They listen to their children and acknowledge them. The child in turn, feels heard and respected. They understand the reason for the rule and are more likely to follow it. I have always felt that respect is a two way street. Respect is never just granted, I feel it has to be earned (to be TRUE respect). To be earned, it also has to be given. This is true in any relationship. Why is it suddenly different when that relationship is between an adult and a child?

Authoritarian parenting results in opposition, defiance, and rebellion. Like that three year old that talks back to you and tells YOU no, making your blood pressure go up. Authoritative parenting results in a mutually respectful relationship with considerably less conflict. Disclaimer: your child WILL still test their boundaries. They are going to do it I promise. But it's just that, a test. Will you pass? Can you keep your own emotions under control and focus on your response? Keep at it, stay consistent with your reasons and reinforce your clear expectations. 

It sounds pretty clear which parenting style is more effective right? That doesn't mean one is any easier than the other. It is MUCH easier to tell your child "no" and "because I said so". It's so much easier to be stressed and angry instead of trying to understand why your child is screaming in the middle of Target. What I hope you realize is that if you want your child's behavior or attitude to change, the first thing you have to do is change your own. 

Think about a conflict you had with your child today (I'm sure you had at least one!). How did you respond? Did you tell them NO without explaining why? Did you get upset because they weren't listening to you? 

Tomorrow, take the opportunity to really pay attention to your kids. Try to understand what they are thinking and feeling. Acknowledge it. Label it. Don't dismiss it. Just because your child is, well, a child, does not make them any less of a person than you are. Think about how YOU would feel in their situation. Honestly. Do it. 

No Easy Task

I have spent six years of my life studying child development and theory, family development and psychology, infancy and prenatal development...

I've spent countless hours caring for young children and several years teaching two and three year olds... 

With all of the knowledge and experience I have packed away, I felt extremely confident when we brought our first daughter Nora home from the hospital three and half years ago...

Let me tell you something...Being a parent is HARD. 

Being a parent is the toughest AND most important job you will ever have in your lifetime. Part of what makes parenting a challenge for me is KNOWING how important EVERYTHING I say or do is. And it is. The experiences a child has in their first five years of life develop who they will be, what they will become; it will shape their thoughts and opinions, define their personality, affect the choices they make, and their relationships for the rest of their life.

Feeling the pressure yet? 

Parenting is no easy task. 

I've opened "the Family Room" as a place to encourage and help parents by sharing my knowledge of child development combined with my "on the job" experiences. I hope that by sharing my journey, both the positive and negative, you will find...

...support, because you are NOT alone
...encouragement, because bad days happen to the best of us
...community, because we NEED to be able to relate to someone in our same situation and/or phase of life
...confidence, because you CAN DO THIS!

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I hope you stick around :) Find my facebook page at www.facebook.com/familyroom and use it as a place to ask advice from other parents and offer suggestions or success stories that may benefit another family!